Confession

I must confess.

I don't always pay attention in church.

Sometimes

I forget the words to the most common songs.

Songs that I've sang for years

Songs that I love

Just for a moment

As I admire

The Drummer

A Man's Best Friend

One of the things I enjoy most is watching my boys together. The Husband always wanted a dog, and Bentley is proving to be a devoted, adoring companion for him. This is the two of them, wandering through la Barriere park on a snowy Monday.

Reasons why a dog is better than a wife (sometimes):

- he's always happy to see him

- only speaks on command

- listens intently to every spoken word

- never doubts or questions

- is always happy to cuddle

- works hard to please

- is never stressed out or PMS'ing

Perspective

About a month ago I assisted in a birth that was more stressful than usual. For a multitude of reasons, the pressure was ON. The doctor I was assisting was stressed as well. And it showed. It seemed I couldn't do anything right for him that day. Through it all, I focused on the Mum in labor. I coached her through her contractions and encouraged her. The end result was a healthy baby, a tired but happy Mum, and a proud Dad.

Their nurse, however, was discouraged and drove home in tears.

I was assigned to care for them the next day as well. They told me more than once that they had appreciated my support. They took pictures of me and the little tyke as well. I reminded myself that if the patient was happy I had done my job well.

A couple of evenings ago I found the new family standing in the hallway. They came to show off their little guy and touch base. Then they told me that he had a gift for me and presented me with a small token of their appreciation.

Token of appreciation: pricetag
Words of appreciation: priceless

It felt so good to be appreciated. My focus is on patient care. Although I'd like to please both the patient and the Doctor, I'd rather leave knowing that my patient was happy and well cared for. It was a stressful day. But I'd do it again. And so, one of my worst days has turned into one of my best memories.

I Clean Because I Love

For those of you who know me, I think you'd say I'm a fairly neat person. I think I would keep my house above the average for cleanliness if I were single.

The Husband, however, wins hands down. Everything must be in it's place. Spots on the mirror, fuzz on the carpet, dust on the coffee table pulls him from a comfortable position on the couch to remove the offense. Otherwise there can be no relaxing. I recently let him know that it drives me crazy when he makes his side of the bed when I'm still in it. Perfectly snugged and tucked and in a deep sleep, when suddenly it happens! Ever so quiety he tugs the blanket so that all of my tucking comes undone and his side has no wrinkles. He thinks the rush of cold air to my toasty body won't wake me. He's wrong.

Today is Valentine's day. We don't really get into the commercialism of this "holiday". However, it happens to be my only day off this week. And just to make his day, I shall make the house cleaner than it already is. I shall do laundry, clean the kitchen, dust, clean the mirrors, vacuum. Now that I've blogged it for the world to see, it's a sure thing and not just an ambition.

And when he walks in the door at 1 or 2 AM, it's the first thing he'll notice.

But first, I'm going to warm up from my long walk with Bentley with my first cup of Java for the day and let the TV entertain me for a little while.

Shift Work Sucks

The Husband and I both do shift work. It interferes. The beauty of working shifts is the days off in between. However, we hardly ever work the same shifts. Thus, we usually work opposite shifts. Which means half of the the time we're single people who just happen to live in the same house. Great for the dog. Not so great for us.

This is one of those weeks. In fact, it's already been a week and the week to come looks no better. I work nights all weekend, and he starts nights on sunday.

We'll have to make the most of Thursday.

Abandoned

The most profound moment of last week happened at work, on a night shift at one of the hospitals I work at. I spent 12 hrs cuddling a child with no Mum, no Dad. No one who would step forward and take responsibility for a life. I don't know the whole story. Only the woman who carried the child would. For 12 hours I comforted, cuddled, fed, protected. I wished I could absorb the pain this little one had already endured so that it wouldn't haunt the future. I imagined what the Mother might have been so afraid of. I prayed that God would protect this innocent one and provide a loving, safe, supportive new family. And I imagined the joy in the new family's eyes when they came to take their Baby home.

On Being Sick and Going Home

There's something about feeling ill that makes me want to go home. I mean, not that I don't visit otherwise. I'm already the only child that visits the parents on a regular basis. Sure, sure, use distance as an excuse. And Tim, living there doesn't count.

Today the Husband was off to a class during the day and out for a Man-Date in the evening. So, I decided I wanted to see my mum and dad.

Mum made homemade chicken noodle soup. I should have taken a picture just to show Jenny. After a bowl of piping hot soup followed by the best coffee in the world (you really should start a coffee/dessert shop mum) we retreated to the living room. There I got a pillow and a blanket and my own personal heater. She went and found a beautiful candle that mimics the northern lights - you'd have to see it to understand. The lights were dimmed, music was provided by the little brother and we watched it change colors and talked. Even my dog got spoiled with meat and bones from the chicken soup.

I should be back on my feet by tomorrow.

I left the Farm with a car full of pork, left over chicken soup, homemade buns, tomato soup, and a couple of items from Costco that she picked up for me just because they were so cheap she couldn't leave them there.

I taught my Dad that a real hug means putting his arms all the way around someone. He thought a tap on the shoulders should count. I won.

And just now, Dad called to make sure I made it home okay.

Speak

My puppy hates the blowdryer. Especially if it's on. And especially if I point it at him. In fact, my otherwise almost silent dog will bark to scare it off. So I decided to use it to my advantage for training purposes. I started saying "speak" before pointing it at him and turning it on (is this considered cruelty to animals?). Then I cut out the blow dryer part and just said the command and got the right subsequent reaction. 15 min later he talks on command. In the bedroom. The kitchen is a different matter entirely. I gave the same command in exactly the same way for 10 minutes with every reaction but the right one. He sat, laid down, rolled over and did any trick he could think of for a treat. But he didn't speak. Back to the bedroom. I said "speak" and his bark shook the mirrors.

Clearly he hasn't mastered the concept of transitive properties.

Sun Dogs

The last 2 mornings during my commute home, I've seen beautiful sun dogs. And I don't just mean 2 bright balls on either side of the sun. Lately they've looked like huge rainbows, shooting straight up into the sky. All of the prism colors were present, illuminating the fields and trees below them. And in between them, the sun rose a big red ball that looked like fire itself. Words can't describe and this picture doesn't do justice.

I wondered how sun dogs are made. I started to google it. And then I decided not to. I'd rather not know. I'd rather stay mystified and find myself in awe when I see things that I can't explain. Sun dogs and northern lights are only two. I chose to thank the Creator for things beyond my comprehension and revel in the beauty of the undefined.